Best E-mails of the Week 9/22/02
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http://www.funnyjunk.com/pages/driving.htm This is a funny animated site about driving. You should probably skip the rest of the links unless you have oodles of time. Plus these links are not ones I would post to my site here. Some are bizarre. Enter at your own risk. Except for 3D pong which is fun.
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Sal,
Cool Drivers Ed site. Thanks for sending it to Bob and me. Last night at our high school reunion party,
two of George and my classmates, Skip and Nancy D. sang all the words from memory to the alma mater
school song you wrote about 38 years ago.
Yeah, we have a life.
Pete
PS I called the high school today and spoke to our old principal. I asked her about the Math SATs.
She said she could (and did) send me my transcript showing my PSAT at 73 and SAT at 700, but
could not comment on anybody else's. Valedictorian Debbie was so gracious to hear my spiel.
Here is the open challenge to both Joe's and Elaine. Call and request your transcript.
Send me proof that you or anyone else beat me in either score, and receive a free gourmet dinner.
Joe C. I think you had like 730 on the Math ACT. Doesn't count. I think Hugh got into Princeton with
about a 730 in English. (Doesn't count.) Good luck!
Remember I did and do give credit to Sister Christopher, the math wiz, because I was the only student
in our class who had her for both algebra and geometry. : )
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Due to the high risk of danger to
women in secluded parking lots, especially during evening hours, the
Minneapolis City Council has established a "Women Only" parking lot at the
Mall of America.
Even the parking lot attendants
are exclusively female so that a comfortable and safe environment is created
for patrons. Below is the first picture available of this world-first
women-only parking lot in Minnesota.
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Paul Harvey Writes:
>
>We tried so hard to make things better for our kids that we made them
>worse.
>For my grandchildren, I'd like better.
>
>I'd really like for them to know about hand me down clothes and homemade
>ice cream and leftover meat loaf sandwiches. I really would.
>
>I hope you learn humility by being humiliated, and that you learn honesty
>by being cheated.
>
>I hope you learn to make your own bed and mow the lawn and wash the car.
>
>And I really hope nobody gives you a brand new car when you are sixteen.
>
>It will be good if at least one time you can see puppies born and your old
>dog put to sleep.
>
>I hope you get a black eye fighting for something you believe in.
>
>I hope you have to share a bedroom with your younger brother/sister. And
>it's all right if you have to draw a line down the middle of the room, but when
>he wants to crawl under the covers with you because he's scared, I hope you
>let him.
>
>When you want to see a movie and your little brother/sister wants to tag
>along, I hope you'll let him/her.
>
>I hope you have to walk uphill to school with your friends and that you
>live in a town where you can do it safely.
>
>On rainy days when you have to catch a ride, I hope you don't ask your
>driver to drop you two blocks away so you won't be seen riding with someone as
>uncool as your Mom.
>
>If you want a slingshot, I hope your Dad teaches you how to make one
>instead of buying one.
>
>I hope you learn to dig in the dirt and read books.
>
>When you learn to use computers, I hope you also learn to add and subtract
>in your head.
>
>I hope you get teased by your friends when you have your first crush on a
>boy\girl, and when you talk back to your mother that you learn what ivory
>soap tastes like.
>
>May you skin your knee climbing a mountain, burn your hand on a stove and
>stick your tongue on a frozen flagpole.
>
>I don't care if you try a beer once, but I hope you don't like it. And if
>a friend offers you dope or a joint, I hope you realize he is not your
>friend.
>
>I sure hope you make time to sit on a porch with your Grandma/Grandpa and
>go fishing with your Uncle.
>
>May you feel sorrow at a funeral and joy during the holidays.
>
>I hope your mother punishes you when you throw a baseball through your
>neighbor's window and that she hugs you and kisses you at
>Hanukkah/Christmas time when you give her a plaster mold of your hand.
>
>These things I wish for you - tough times and disappointment, hard work
>and happiness. To me, it's the only way to appreciate life.
>
>Written with a pen. Sealed with a kiss. I'm here for you. And if I die
>before you do, I'll go to heaven and wait for you.
>
>Send this to all of your friends. We secure our friends, not by accepting
>favors, but by doing them.
>
>
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Subject:
God's voice mail > Most of us have now learned to live with voice mail as a necessary part of > our lives. Have you ever wondered what it would be like if God decided to > install voice mail? Imagine praying and hearing the following:
>
Thank you for calling heaven.
I am
sorry, all our Angels and Saints are busy helping other sinners right
For reservations to heaven, please enter JOHN followed by the numbers, 3 16.
> If you are calling after hours and need emergency assistance, please
Pete
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