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All I need to learn about Life I learned from the Easter Bunny!

Don't put all your eggs in one basket.

Walk softly and carry a big carrot.

Everyone needs a friend who is all ears.

There's no such thing as too much candy.
All work and no play can make you a basket case.
A cute little tail attracts a lot of attention.

Everyone is entitled to a bad hare day.
Let happy thoughts multiply like rabbits.
Some body parts should be floppy.
Keep your paws off other people's jellybeans.

Good things come in small-sugarcoated packages.
The grass is greener in someone else's basket.

An Easter bonnet can cover the wildest hare.
To show your true colors you have to come out of the shell.
The best things in life are still sweet and gooey.

Wishing You A Very
Happy Easter 2002 !!!!!!

And a Happy Passover during this time of tension by suicide bombers in Israel. We look forward to Daniel's Bar Mitzvah in May. We hope those of you who received the CD's by our local congregation of nuns with the 14 songs for the 14 stations of the cross are enjoying that beautiful music.

For all who get frustrated with the computer.

Bill Gates arrives at the Pearly Gates....
"Well, Bill," said God, "I'm really confused on this one. I'm not
sure whether to send you to Heaven or Hell! After all, you
enormously helped society by putting a computer in almost
every home in the world, and yet you created that ghastly
Windows. I'm going to do something I've never done before.
I'm going to let you decide where you want to go!"
   Mr. Gates replied, "Well, thanks, God. What's the difference
   between the two?"
   God said, "You can take a peek at both places briefly if it will
   help you decide. Shall we look at Hell first?" "Sure!" said Bill.
   "Let's go!"
   Bill was amazed! He saw a clean, white sandy beach with clear
   waters. There were thousands of beautiful women running around,
   playing in the water, laughing and frolicking about. The sun was
   shining and the temperature was as perfect! Bill said, "This is great!
   If this is Hell, I can't wait to see Heaven!" To which God replied,
   "Let's go!" and off they went.
   Bill saw puffy white clouds in a beautiful blue sky with angels
   drifting about playing harps and singing. It was nice, but surely
   not as enticing as Hell. Mr. Gates thought for only a brief moment
   and rendered his decision. "God, I do believe I would like to go to
   Hell."    "As you desire," said God.
   Two weeks later, God decided to check up on the late billionaire
   to see how things were going. He found Bill shackled to a wall,
   screaming among the hot flames in a dark cave. He was being
   burned and tortured by demons.
   "How ya doin', Bill?" asked God.
Bill responded with anguish and despair. "This is awful!
This is not what I expected at all! What happened to the beach
and the beautiful women playing in the water?"
"Oh THAT!" said God. "That was the screen saver!"

Some "Senior" personal ads seen in Florida and Arizona newspapers:
FOXY LADY: Sexy, fashion-conscious blue-haired beauty, 80's, slim,5'-4" (used to be 5-6), searching
for sharp-looking, sharp-dressing companion. Matching white shoes and belt a plus.
LONG-TERM COMMITMENT: Recent widow who has just buried fourth husband looking for someone
to round out a six- unit plot. Dizziness, fainting, shortness of breath not a problem.
SERENITY NOW: I am into solitude, long walks, sunrises, the ocean, yoga and meditation. If you
are the silent type, let's get together, take our hearing aids out and enjoy quiet times.
WINNING SMILE: Active grandmother with original teeth seeking a dedicated flossier to share
rare steaks, corn on the cob and caramel candy.
BEATLES OR STONES? I still like to rock, still like to cruise in my Camaro on Saturday nights
and still like to play the air guitar. If you were a groovy chick, or are now a groovy hen, let's get
together and listen to my boss collection of eight-track tapes.
MEMORIES: I can usually remember Monday through Thursday. If you can remember Friday,
Saturday and Sunday, let's put our two heads together.
MINT CONDITION: Male, 1932, high mileage, good condition, some hair, many new parts including
hip, knee, cornea, valves. Isn't in running condition, but walks well.

A husband is advised by a psychiatrist to assert himself. "You don't
have to let your wife henpeck you! Go home and show her you are the
boss!"
Of course, the husband takes the doctor's advice. He rushes home, slams
the door, shakes his fist in his wife's face, and growls, "From now on,
you're taking orders from me! I want my supper right now, and when you
get it on the table, go upstairs, and lay out my best clothes. Tonight,
I'm going out with the boys, and you are going to stay at home where
you belong! And another thing; . . . guess who's going to comb my hair,
give me a shave, and tie my necktie?"
His wife says calmly, "The undertaker. . ."