Best E-mails of the Week 2/16/03

Having returned from Florida, where Baseball Spring Training is underway,

I see that the Yankees have ensured the 2003 pennant by signing every player in baseball.

http://www.theonion.com/onion3904/yankees.html

Above: Some of the New York Yankees' newest additions are introduced to the press.

An elderly lady called 911 on  her cell phone
to report that her car
> had been broken into. She was  hysterical as
she explained her situation to
> the  dispatcher:
>       "They've stolen the stereo,  the steering
wheel, the brake pedal and
> even the accelerator!" she cried.
>       The dispatcher said, "Stay calm.  An officer is
on the way."
>       A few minutes later, the officer radioed in.
"Disregard," he said.
> "She got in the backseat by mistake."
>
 

> >An elderly couple, he, age 92, she, age 89, are all excited
> >about their decision to get married. They go for a stroll to
> >discuss the wedding and on the way they pass a drugstore
> >and decide to enter to look around. The prospective
> >bridegroom addresses the man behind the counter:
> >
> >"Are you the owner?"
> >
> >The pharmacist answers "Yes".
> >
> >"We're about to get married. Do you sell heart medication?"
> >
> >Pharmacist: "Of course we do."
> >
> >"How about medicine for circulation?"
> >
> >Pharmacist: "All kinds."
> >
> >"Medicine for rheumatism, scoliosis? "
> >
> >Pharmacist: "Definitely."
> >
> >"How about Viagra?"
> >
> >Pharmacist: "Of course."
> >
> >"Medicine for memory problems, arthritis, Jaundice?"
> >
> >Pharmacist: "Yes, a large variety. The works."
> >
> >"What about vitamins, sleeping pills, Geritol?"
> >
> >Pharmacist: "Absolutely."
> >
> >"You sell wheelchairs and walkers?"
> >
> >Pharmacist: "All speeds and sizes."
> >
> >
> >The man then says to the pharmacist: "We'd like to register here for
> >wedding gifts, please.

I liked Reminisce Magazine. It reminded me of the book we wrote with pictures from the 50's.

Have you seen it? Check out  http://reminisce.com/

Boycott?
 

It might be interesting for you to know which oil

companies are the best to buy gas from and which major companies import

Middle Eastern oil (for the period 9/1/00 - 8/31/01):

Shell................ .......205,742,000 barrels

Chevron/Texaco....... 144,332,000 barrels

Exxon /Mobil............. 130,082,000 barrels

Marathon/Speedway.. 117,740,000 barrels

Amoco................ 62,231,000 barrels

If you do the math at $30/barrel, these imports amount to over $18 BILLION!

Here are some large companies that do not import Middle Eastern oil:

Citgo....................0 barrels

Sunoco............. ..0 barrels

Conoco............. ..0 barrels

Sinclair............... 0 barrels

BP/Phillips.......... 0 barrels

Hess...................0 barrels

All of this information is available from the Department of Energy and each

is required to state where they get their oil and how much they are

importing.

Here is a funny test for college engineering students

http://www.tcnj.edu/~mcgover4/flash/16engineerquiz/engineerquiz.html

Here is the space shuttle drawing I did email out to some of you from Florida.

Back in the wintry Northeast, and in dire need of Spring training,
 

Pete